Archive for May 23rd, 2008

Getting ready for Carnival of Mathematics #34

May 23, 2008

On Friday May 30, we’ll be hosting the 34th Carnival of Mathematics!  We’d love to have your submissions:  you can post them directly in the comments here, or send them by email to hlewis5 followed by the @ and then ending with naz.edu (put something like “Carnival” in the subject line if you think of it), or via the Submit form here.

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Teacher Arrested

May 23, 2008

One of our students sent us the following news story to post here. (Thanks Kristen!)

A public school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International Airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a set square, a slide rule, and a calculator. At a morning press conference, the Attorney General said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-gebra movement. He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.

“Al-gebra is a problem for us,” the Attorney General said. “They desire solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in a search of absolute value. They use secret code names like ‘x’ and ‘y’ and refer to themselves as ‘unknowns,’ but we have determined they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, “There are 3 sides to every triangle.” When asked to comment on the arrest, President George Bush said, “If God had wanted us to have better Weapons of Math Instruction, He would have given us more fingers…………and toes.”

White House aides told reporters they could not recall a more intelligent or profound statement by the President.